A Soliloquy on Weight

A Soliloquy on Weight

Now that I've been training with ENP for a little over a month, people I see who know about my training often ask about my progress. Usually, the question sounds something like, "How much weight have you lost?" or "Can you tell if you've lost weight?"

The answer I give usually perplexes them, because the truth is, I haven't really lost any weight since I started training with ENP. There hasn't been a radical drop in the scale or pressure to make a certain weight during weekly "weigh ins" with my trainers. The number that flashes on the scale in front of me is not significantly lower than it was when it started. In fact, I have been told that my goal during this journey is to gain weight.

When I was told that I needed to gain weight to meet my goals, every idea of weight gain and loss that society has fed me over the past 19 years made me very doubtful that weight gain could be a good idea.  All the commercials, movies, weight-loss wonder pills, and miracle weight-loss workouts I have been exposed to my entire life had led me (and many other young women) to believe that weight gain was to be avoided at all costs. How in the world could weight gain be a positive thing?

I needed a reality check. 

I needed to learn that weight really is just a number.

Really.

Here are some things I learned when I researched what my weight really means:

1. Your weight is a fluctuating number that is influenced by many factors in your life. Some factors, like your diet and exercise, are under your control. Other factors, like water retention and cortisol levels, are not always under your control.

2. No one knows how much you weigh unless you tell them. The number on the scale is your business, not the world's business. If you feel healthy and proud of the way you look, your weight should not matter to you or any of your peers.

3. You can gain weight and lose inches (seriously). Muscle weighs more than fat, so if you lose fat and gain muscle, you can look great and still gain weight.

So, next time I step on the scale, the number in front of me will not matter. If I gain weight through this journey, I will not fret or question my lifestyle changes. I will take pride in the way my body feels and the strength I'm beginning to gain. I am not gaining unhealthy weight, I'm gaining strength and muscle. I know that I'm making choices that benefit my body, and as long as I'm proud of the way I look, the number flashing on the scale in front of me is irrelevant. Weight is just a number. Really. I refuse to let societal pressures tell me otherwise.